By Melanie Walker
Cue phrase: “What goes around comes around.” Yeah, yeah ok, whatever. Let me just put this quote in the place where quotes go to die.
I’m going to stand on my stake and make a brutal confession to you: I have always struggled with wishing people well.
Anyone that knows me may gasp because I’m a very positive and uplifting person. But you know, it gets hard when friend after friend announces their engagement to you, has a baby, or progresses in life in a way that is just incomprehensible to you in the current moment. I’ve struggled with my love for the person but the clawing desire of wanting what someone else has and uttering the classic phrase that I’m sure every person in their 20’s has groaned and said: When is it going to be my turn?
Wishing well for others is difficult, especially if the person has what you want or if the person has hurt you in some way. If you’re finding that you have the same struggle I have had in the past--
Take a deep breath.
Look that person in the eye.
And put on a smile, no matter how difficult or forced it feels.
Trust me on this. It’ll be much better for you in the long run.
I have an inside joke with myself that if I press the “like” button for every wedding picture I see on my newsfeed, that will be how many likes and well-wishes I will get when it finally is my turn to post the picture of myself in that wedding dress I pinned on Pinterest and the dude that made it all worthwhile for me.
Want to know how I know this? Because I am a firm believer in Karma. Karma is usually seen as a negative thing, but Karma can actually be a pretty sweet deal.
I’m not saying that I’m only nice to others for my own personal benefit. I’m saying practicing good Karma makes you an overall better person—one who people can rely on to share their joy in their success, one who knows how to love their friends and family, and one who knows how to be happy for other people. And not a forged, “waxy-smiled” happiness—a true and genuine happiness for other people and a desire for their happiness too.
So I’ll say it again. When that friend looks you in the eye and announces their promotion over you or that they just got a boyfriend when you’re in one of life’s many slumps, you put on that smile and congratulate them. Fake it till you make it, then move on with your life. When your ex-boyfriend or ex-best friend from college posts their new baby picture or announces their Master’s degree: either choose to like it or not, smile, and keep scrolling. You are much better than the shifty eyes or painful smile someone gives you when you have a win of your own.
In personal experience, every smile I’ve given to others has repaid back to me in many of my life’s highs and lows. I have always had someone beside me to either cheer or console and I know that wouldn’t be the case if I didn’t work at actually meaning “best wishes!” when I say it to someone.
So, Karma is a blessing. Don’t believe me? Try it out for yourself.
Images from http://gettingthewordswrong.com/